Well I Tried to be Optmistic :(

It seems every day I try to be optimistic, but then something dumps me in a pit like atheists getting $11,000+ in donations and gays getting thousands for fertility treatments, but the person with a blood clot in his leg can't get one red cent to help cover his medical bills and treatments for something that WILL KILL HIM!!!!!

What the hell is wrong with this world? Should I just take a gun and shoot my self to end the pain? I try and try and try and try. And it seems I keep getting kick down to the ground again and again, I don't even know why I bother fighting any more.   

The worst thing is I generally don't have any friends and I don't mean the facebook or twitter kind, I mean the real kind who know you personally and are there for you.

A this point If I don't get any help soon I might do it.